In a way, I riffed the whole "Brothers, not in blood, but in bond" idea.
Tony is starting to see mirrors in Barnes as well as all these windows. Things he can connect with and interact with. A certain level of identifiable connection to frame how different the other parts are. Tony is hyper intelligent when it comes to machines and the mechanical sciences, space, chemistry, he understands. With people and emotions however, as you said, he is a child grabbing at growth.
For me, I relate to the isolation and the complete lack of age appropriate childhood interactions. It's a mirror for me. And I love making Tony grow the fuck up in moments like this. Where he runs face first into a learning moment and can either adapt or stall out.
The worst part is now that he sees Barnes as a complete person, sees him as James, Tony is devastated by everything done to and taken from Bucky. He thinks suicide is a complete waste.
But he also can't keep taking options away. So. Cerebral Actualizing Neuro- blahblahblah a tool for Bucky to be in the driver's seat of his brain. In a way some could argue no one should be.
I have, so many feels on all the things Bucky could do with CANDIELAND BARF. But they conflict and I want them all to be true, so... this fic ends with Tony bringing Bucky the unit, and admitting he read his slam poetry.
And that he wants Bucky to have all the control and options he never had before.
Because I secretly wish for an AU where WS came in from the cold and didn't kill Maria, where Tony fits a lot of Bucky's needs for protecting the squishy, and Bucky works to coax Tony out of his comfort zone bubble, bridging gaps etc. They do beautiful mechanical engineering together and make fantastically nerdy robot babies together and Steve is both incredibly unnerved and endlessly delighted by the two slick brunette goofballs.
Re: BARFing Out Hurt (5/7?)
Tony is starting to see mirrors in Barnes as well as all these windows. Things he can connect with and interact with. A certain level of identifiable connection to frame how different the other parts are. Tony is hyper intelligent when it comes to machines and the mechanical sciences, space, chemistry, he understands. With people and emotions however, as you said, he is a child grabbing at growth.
For me, I relate to the isolation and the complete lack of age appropriate childhood interactions. It's a mirror for me. And I love making Tony grow the fuck up in moments like this. Where he runs face first into a learning moment and can either adapt or stall out.
The worst part is now that he sees Barnes as a complete person, sees him as James, Tony is devastated by everything done to and taken from Bucky. He thinks suicide is a complete waste.
But he also can't keep taking options away. So. Cerebral Actualizing Neuro- blahblahblah a tool for Bucky to be in the driver's seat of his brain. In a way some could argue no one should be.
I have, so many feels on all the things Bucky could do with CANDIELAND BARF. But they conflict and I want them all to be true, so... this fic ends with Tony bringing Bucky the unit, and admitting he read his slam poetry.
And that he wants Bucky to have all the control and options he never had before.
Because I secretly wish for an AU where WS came in from the cold and didn't kill Maria, where Tony fits a lot of Bucky's needs for protecting the squishy, and Bucky works to coax Tony out of his comfort zone bubble, bridging gaps etc. They do beautiful mechanical engineering together and make fantastically nerdy robot babies together and Steve is both incredibly unnerved and endlessly delighted by the two slick brunette goofballs.