hydratrashmeme | Dumpster #3: The Great Pacific Garbage Patch

Holy shitballs, look at us go. Welcome to Captain America fandom's resident wretched hive of scum and villainy: ROUND THREE. AKA Bad Guys Do Dirtybadwrong Things To Your Faves, AKA the Hydra Trash Party kinkmeme. As usual, BLANKET NON-CON AND NSFW WARNINGS apply: just assume going in that everything in this landfill is unfit for human consumption.

Rules in brief: don't be a jerk except to fictional characters, warnings for particularly fucked-up garbage are nice but not required, thou shalt not judge the trashiness of thy neighbor's kinks unless thy neighbor is trying to pass off their rotting banana peels and half-eaten pizza crusts as a healthy romantic dinner for two, off-topic comments may be chucked out of the dumpster at management's discretion, management's discretion decrees that omegaverse, soulbond AUs, D/s-verse, non-superpowered AUs, and dark!good guys AUs are off-topic.

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Round 3 is closed; comments and fills in existing threads are still welcome, but all new prompts go to Round 4.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So Bucky's been through some trashy stuff, per the standard, and so has Steve - maybe an abusive gaslighty relationship with Rumlow, maybe bad guys really like doing terrible terrible things to captain America when he is tied up and at their mercy. Probably both. Maybe Pierce also had a hand in it. Whatever the reason, both of them have terrible trash pasts, so of course despite their romantic (and probably sexual) attraction to each other it makes their relationship kind of difficult.
- both of them really dread sex and possibly there is some kind of physical mark of the abuse they went through - scars or a brand or maybe like, scar tissue around their genitals and anus, which would give away the terrible trash past if seen
-the discovery is made after lots of terror on both their parts and pushing themselves to have sex before they are ready, and it results in the two of them feeling guilty that they pressured the other one into sex and that the other one "had it worse". Maybe Bucky thinks that Steve has it worse because he isn't a murderer like Bucky is, and therefore didn't deserve it poem Bucky did. maybe Steve thinks Bucky had it worse because he had to endure seventy years of it and from so many people, whereas Steve "only" was abused by a handful (or two) of people and he's only had to endure it since he got the serum, except maybe a few incidents in the back alleys of Brooklyn.
-they both are constantly worried about becoming abusers, especially since they both know how horrible it is to be on the other side of that, but instead of just being mindful and respectful they constantly question themselves and are anxious about every single interaction. Bucky knows Ateve would roll over and let him kill him. Steve is always really aware that he is basically Bucky's only support structure in both emotional and financial terms.
Basically I just want anything where they are both traumatised and it's two way recovery trash and since they are both stubborn assholes who dig their heels in against therapy (Steve more than Bucky) they both develop really unhealthy perspectives that really fuck with their relationship. But they still love each other and want it to work and there is So Much Anguish

Backed with the intensity of a thousand suns!

Ooh. I like the idea that not only does each think the other "had it worse," it happened in such different contexts for each of them that they don't actually understand each other's experiences as well as they assume. Like, for Steve it was a single violent incident (or several isolated ones) and it was more about hurt and humiliation than sex. But Bucky had someone furtively taking advantage of him over a long period of time, by coercion rather than force, and it was one small component in a larger environment of dehumanization. So Steve assumes Bucky is downplaying his own pain and it takes him a while to realize Bucky can be drifting back towards a really warped mindset without any overt distress. Whereas Bucky is deeply skeptical about Steve's claims to be more-or-less okay as long as they haven't stepped on any landmines, and is kind of taken aback by how much Steve loathes rough sex and how violently he reacts to anything that reminds him of being raped.

(What if the physical mark on Bucky isn't scarring, but total, permanent absence of body hair? "Lower maintenance," he says with a too-casual shrug the first time he takes his clothes off, not meeting Steve's eyes. "Easier than shaving my chest every time they wanted to slap electrodes on it. The porn-star look was just a bonus, really.")

UNF that last paragraph

Yeah I'm just imagining how Bucky got introduced to the porn star look in the first place and it's lovely really

no wait

it's awful. I should be sorry but I'm just not.

Dumpster #3: The Great Pacific Garbage Patch

Steve and Bucky trying to deal with both their trash pasts, with dubious success

Re: Steve and Bucky trying to deal with both their trash pasts, with dubious success

Re: Steve and Bucky trying to deal with both their trash pasts, with dubious success

Re: Steve and Bucky trying to deal with both their trash pasts, with dubious success

Re: Steve and Bucky trying to deal with both their trash pasts, with dubious success