hydratrashmeme | Dumpster #3: The Great Pacific Garbage Patch

Holy shitballs, look at us go. Welcome to Captain America fandom's resident wretched hive of scum and villainy: ROUND THREE. AKA Bad Guys Do Dirtybadwrong Things To Your Faves, AKA the Hydra Trash Party kinkmeme. As usual, BLANKET NON-CON AND NSFW WARNINGS apply: just assume going in that everything in this landfill is unfit for human consumption.

Rules in brief: don't be a jerk except to fictional characters, warnings for particularly fucked-up garbage are nice but not required, thou shalt not judge the trashiness of thy neighbor's kinks unless thy neighbor is trying to pass off their rotting banana peels and half-eaten pizza crusts as a healthy romantic dinner for two, off-topic comments may be chucked out of the dumpster at management's discretion, management's discretion decrees that omegaverse, soulbond AUs, D/s-verse, non-superpowered AUs, and dark!good guys AUs are off-topic.

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Round 3 is closed; comments and fills in existing threads are still welcome, but all new prompts go to Round 4.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Steve stepped into the room, and looked at Bucky. Bucky felt like his skin was itching, painfully aware of the fact he was standing there wearing only a towel. It wasn't just his nakedness that bothered him. It was the knowledge that all his scars were on display, that he looked vulnerable. He was worried it came across as him trying to manipulate Steve, again, when he'd learned by now that trying such things ended only in disaster.

He held his ground.
"Hey..." He whispered, fighting to keep his voice steady. He didn't know what it was now. Maybe he hadn't gone far enough away. Maybe when Steve had said that he should find somewhere else to stay, he had meant outside of the tower. That Bucky's sins had cost him all the comforts he had found here. He would deserve that. He knew he would.

Steve's hand reached up towards him, then away, in a grotesque parody of his aborted attempt at congratulating Natasha. Bucky remembered how Steve had touched him before, how he had traced his scars. That memory stung, now that it wouldn't happen again.

"Bucky?" Steve asked, and Bucky could barely suppress the shudder that went through him at hearing his name.
"Why are you here Steve?"
"You were watching the whole conversation. Jarvis replayed the entire thing to me. You were watching." Steve said softly, and Bucky looked down, trying to find yet more words of apology. "Why?"
"I wanted to know what ...I needed to see how you would respond."

Steve nodded slowly, seeming to think over the new information. He didn't appear angry now, just deeply thoughtful.
"And how did I respond?"
"You were kind to her." Bucky said softly. "You were kind, but you were afraid to hurt her. And then you found out that I had..." He couldn't bring himself to say that he had lied, so his words trailed off.

Steve nodded, breath leaving him in a soft huff. He looked into Bucky's eyes.
"Alright. One last question, then I'll let you sleep."
"Thank you." Bucky whispered, wrapping his arms around his chest, feeling open and exposed.

"Natasha said that what you described didn't happen to her."
The question, unspoken, hung in the air between them. Bucky couldn't bring himself to confess, not after everything. It would seem too much like he was playing for sympathy, trying to be forgiven for a sin that was too bad to be brushed aside.

Steve took a step forward, and this time his hand did rest on Bucky's flesh arm, fingertips absently tracing the outline of a scar. Bucky leaned into the contact for a moment, before remembering that this was no longer his right, that he was not entitled to such comfort. Steve didn't stop though, just looked at him with calm clear eyes.
"So if you didn't see it happen to her... I don't think you made it up, did you?"

Bucky shook his head, aware he was shivering now. Things seemed to spin out of control for a moment, and as they calmed he found that he was sat on the sofa beside Steve, Steve's gaze on his face with intensity but not anger any more. He swallowed thickly.

"Bucky, throw me a bone here..." Steve pleaded, and Bucky realised the question was hanging between them, both of them too nervous to ask. In the end, it came down to him. Resisting the urge to start crying, he nodded once. Seeing the way Steve looked at him, he took a deep breath.

"Me." He whispered, and when he wasn't immediately struck, he found the courage for more words. "It happened to me."

Strong arms wrapped around him, and he looked up to see Steve's face. Steve looked angry, and he flinched back, frightened that his honesty would be mistaken for further attempts at manipulating Steve. But Steve's embrace was warm.

Bucky didn't know if Steve was about to leave forever, and with that as a possibility he wanted to hold onto him for as long as possible. He stayed silent, in Steve's arms, as the minutes ticked by.

"I'm sorry." Steve's voice was gentle, but in the quiet of the room it still startled him. "I'm sorry you couldn't tell me. And I’m sorry that I…that I thought I understood.”
Bucky opened his mouth to explain, but all his excuses sounded weak and useless. Instead, he swallowed and leaned in.
"You know now."

Steve sighed against his ear, and nodded. "You want to finish your shower and come back up? We can talk about this."
Bucky hesitated. He was frightened, and he didn't want to talk more about it, not at this moment. But he didn't want to hurt Steve either. He'd caused enough pain.
"I'd rather stay here tonight." He whispered. Pain flitted across Steve's face, and he tried to hide it. Bucky reached for his hand. "But you can stay for a while longer."

With that, he relaxed against Steve's side, feeling Steve's fingers tracing over his scars. They had a lot to talk about, but they had time for that.

Aw. This is so great. I love how it doesn't end all perfect. There's a long way for them to go before things even approach okay, and that's not dealing with Bucky's shit.

(Did you leave off like this in order to have room for a possible sequel, or just because it's a great place to end?)

What a delicate, complicated, hopeful ending! I loved this, and you brought it to a beautiful conclusion.

FAVORITE PART was the way Bucky worried that Steve would think he was playing for sympathy, trying to manipulate him, and the way he expected to be hit for his confession.

+1 I love that

Aw, babies. This hurts in the best way.

Dumpster #3: The Great Pacific Garbage Patch

Fill: Giving the Blame (8/8)

Re: Fill: Giving the Blame (8/8)

Re: Fill: Giving the Blame (8/8)

Re: Fill: Giving the Blame (8/8)

Re: Fill: Giving the Blame (8/8)