Dumpster #3: The Great Pacific Garbage Patch

[trashmod]

Holy shitballs, look at us go. Welcome to Captain America fandom's resident wretched hive of scum and villainy: ROUND THREE. AKA Bad Guys Do Dirtybadwrong Things To Your Faves, AKA the Hydra Trash Party kinkmeme. As usual, BLANKET NON-CON AND NSFW WARNINGS apply: just assume going in that everything in this landfill is unfit for human consumption.

Rules in brief: don't be a jerk except to fictional characters, warnings for particularly fucked-up garbage are nice but not required, thou shalt not judge the trashiness of thy neighbor's kinks unless thy neighbor is trying to pass off their rotting banana peels and half-eaten pizza crusts as a healthy romantic dinner for two, off-topic comments may be chucked out of the dumpster at management's discretion, management's discretion decrees that omegaverse, soulbond AUs, D/s-verse, non-superpowered AUs, and dark!good guys AUs are off-topic.

[Round 1] [Round 2] [Fill post] [Chatter post] [hydratrashmeme Pinboard archive (maintained by greenkirtle)] [Round 3 in flat view (comments in non-threaded chronological order, most recent last)]

Round 3 is closed; comments and fills in existing threads are still welcome, but all new prompts go to Round 4.

Comments

Female Bucky/WS

[(Anonymous)]

Always!female Bucky/WS (depending on the time you want) getting her period and being totally incapacitated by pain. Maybe it's pre-Zola and she always had access to pain medication before captivity. Maybe it's the first time since the WS has been thawed that she's not too drugged-up to feel the pain. Even if there's a 'man up' order, situation, or comment, I'd like it to be made clear that she cannot 'man up' or push through the pain, that she is actually unable to continue the mission or situation. How this plays out is up to you (only no no: no graphic period sex please).

Bucky aggressively owning his bodily autonomy (eating disorder and/or self harm possibly)

[(Anonymous)]

I would LOVE to see Bucky being aggressive or almost territorial about his bodily autonomy and his right to do what he wants.

No I don't HAVE to get the burning-hot pan with my flesh hand, Steve, but you can't stop me so I CAN and I WILL.

No you CAN'T touch me on the elbow to get past me because I'm a PERSON and I have the right to NOT be touched if I say NO.

No I don't NEED to eat until I puke but I CAN and nobody is stopping me for the first time in my memory so FUCK YOU I will.

+ if this turns into an eating disorder (I can eat as much as I want and then puke and then eat more because NOBODY is going to be mad at me for wasting food or make me eat it again)

++ if this turns into self-harming behavior (I cut myself and I left a scar and NOBODY CAN STOP ME. I can make myself ugly so nobody wants to fuck me again or I can make myself pretty with all these intricate designs I don't give a FUCK if they bleed or hurt Steve).

Re: Bucky aggressively owning his bodily autonomy (eating disorder and/or self harm possibly)

[(Anonymous)]

Bucky drinking alcohol until it makes him throw up.

Bucky self harming with the door WIDE OPEN like "You wanna see this shit, Steve? No? I didn't fucking think so."

Food Issues

[(Anonymous)]

Bucky with food issues / an eating disorder.

It's so clearly (to an observer) related to (sexual) abuse, but Steve and/or Bucky can't see it or don't want to acknowledge it.

Bucky with texture issues (thick shakes, salty broths). Bucky with taste issues (salty, sour, maybe something related to treats). Bucky with situation issues (he can eat thin soups when he's sitting at a table but on the couch it makes him gag). Etc.

Would prefer if the issues were specifically related to the nature of the abuse (i.e. salty/sour liquid = jizz etc) rather than all specific sense memories (i.e. one time Pierce gave him mint candy as a treat, now Bucky can't eat mint), but a mix of both would also be very very awesome.

Re: Food Issues (OP)

[(Anonymous)]

In addition:

+ Bucky having trouble feeling full: trash reasons.

+ Bucky having trouble feeling too hungry: early captivity/punishment.

+ Bucky completely refusing to talk about ANYTHING until it becomes a serious medical issue (which wouldn't take long because supersoldier metabolism).

Bucky - trashy self punishment

[(Anonymous)]

Bucky basically just expects horrible things to happen to him post CATWS.
He just expects Steve to rape him until he bleeds. He feels like the whole nice thing is an act. Hence why he's been trying to flee from Steve.
So when he's finally caught by Steve and Sam, who unfortunately have to restrain him, he's trembling and just falls to his knees and waits for his punishment.
Maybe he's tired and hungry and he just accepts that he'll be captured by Hydra or by the Avengers or someone eventually. So he gives in. But then Steve doesn't punish him.
Sometimes the handlers would just let Bucky suffer his guilt at disappointing them. So he would get to the point where he would just break down and beg for his punishment.

And then Steve doesn't punish him, so Bucky is left to his own devices because he desperately needs it. True, he didn't kill Steve, but he almost did. Steve is now his handler and Bucky needs punishment or order will collapse.

+ Bucky tying a rubber band around his balls for a certain period of time.
+ Bucky filling himself with something big, only using the barest bit of lube so that he's still 'functional' but will be reminded of his failure.
+Bucky choking himself with a belt in private.
+ Having an orgasm from his punishments and then feeling even worse because he didn't get permission to come and he's not supposed to enjoy punishments!!

++++ Steve finding out (OF COURSE). Preferably Bucky tearfully confessing his failures. Preferably in front of Sam also.

Re: Bucky - trashy self punishment

[(Anonymous)]

Bucky walking around with balls tied and/or said dildo inside of him and nobody being the wiser. Out in public at a restaurant or something with Sam and Steve for extra fun.

The cleanest corner of the trash-heap

[(Anonymous)]

We love greasy-haired, black-eyed Bucky in the field, but let's imagine that when he's on base the WS is kept scrupulously clean. Maybe they're legitimately worried about his serum creating super-resistant bacteria, maybe a particular handler (or Pierce, I can see this with him) enacts their germophobia on the WS, maybe supercleanliness is part of the whole Hydra culture. Bucky is hosed down, scrubbed down, pressure-washed, deloused, disinfected and generally put through the wringer every time he comes out of cryo, goes into cryo, leaves for a mission, returns from a mission, gets fucked, is about to get fucked, etc etc. Whether out of sincere squid-Nazi hangups or just to fuck with him, everyone treats him like he's contaminated and too nasty to touch (they keep this up even during beatings and other forms of abuse, with comments about sanitizing themselves as soon as it's over). Bucky is desperate for human contact but is completely convinced they're right and he's a walking biohazard who needs constant decontamination. I would love it if they expect him to do most of the cleaning rituals himself (i.e., work the scrub brush and bleach until his skin is red and raw) but under close supervision with constant berating reminders and corrections. "Get under your fingernails. And the toenails, Christ, do I have to spell everything out for you?" "Pull your foreskin back again, you only washed it for like two minutes. Gonna make me sick here." Maybe the one thing he can't do for himself is the icy, astringent enemas - not the regular kind with tubing, but basically just a blast of water up his ass until he's shaking with cold and convulsing with cramps.

The best part is the trash aftermath, of course - Bucky is obsessively clean and maybe at first Steve thinks it's kind of good - Bucky's into self-care, taking an interest in his appearance, right? But of course it's rapidly clear he's taking it to painful extremes and seems convinced that he's too filthy and disgusting to be around and probably a danger to Steve. He chooses the harshest, most industrial cleaning products - maybe not even stuff meant to be used on people, and he's got desiccated, cracked skin on his hands, miserable red irritation around his groin, but he thinks, maybe if he just spends another hour under the hottest (coldest?) setting of the shower, it'll be safe enough to let Steve put his hand on Bucky's shoulder. Bucky would like that very much.

(This shit hits me where I live, so I would be eternally grateful to anyone who took it on!)

Re: The cleanest corner of the trash-heap

[(Anonymous)]

I second this and humbly suggest a title: Neat Freak

Rumlow gets raped

[(Anonymous)]

By terrorists or some such while on a STRIKE mission.

Preening, cockatiel Rumlow, post rape having self esteem issues. Nobody notices except maybe Rollins who just realizes that he's quieter lately.
Bucky was the first and only one to see him after the rape and helped him get his pants back on. Nobody else knows that he was raped because Rumlow would rather die than anyone know.

The asset notices of course and having been the one to find Rumlow starts to repeat what he considers to be useful advice like 'It hurts less if you just relax next time.' And Rumlow, who has never seen the asset raped or be anything less than amazing-in-combat, deadly precision, is just rocked by this realization.
He makes the asset swear not to tell anyone, threatens him, etc. Bucky is puzzled as to why Rumlow is so worried, but he readily agrees because he can't disobey. Rumlow is all relieved... until the asset starts treating him differently. Like, more gently and with concern.

+ The asset doesn't stop. Even after a wipe, he can somehow tell that Rumlow was raped and feels empathy for him because Rumlow is a handler. So he keeps trying in various ways to cheer Rumlow up.
+ All horrible trashy ways that reinforce Rumlow's insecurity and hurt his fragile masculinity
++++ Rumlow breaking down crying and getting a hug from the asset. Everyone else being totally confused.

Re: Rumlow gets raped

[(Anonymous)]

Also, all my love if the rapists notice how good he smells with that Axe body spray.

And of course, Rumlow comes during the rape *coughs*

Rumlow's shame boners

[(Anonymous)]

Rumlow's fragile masculinity and shame boners have both been well explored in the dumpster, but there can never be too much of either in my humble opinion.

So give me proud, peacocking Commander Rumlow, Axe-wearing douchebag extraordinaire, who's secretly jerks off to the thought of taking the Asset's place during trash party gangbangs. Give me aggressively masculine Rumlow mocking new recruits and generally being a misogynist, homophobic dickbag, and then going home and imagining those new recruits fucking him into his matress. Give me Rumlow who pretends to drool over lingerie clad women in front of the team, but is secretly picturing himself wearing the skimpy panties and filmy stockings instead.

Just give me all of Rumlow's dirtiest, most secret shameboners. If you can work in someone else (or multiple others) in HYDRA figuring out Rumlow's fantasies and using them against him for endless mocking and trashy sexy blackmail purposes as well, that would also be quite welcome.

Re: Rumlow's shame boners

[(Anonymous)]

I'm going to add another layer of delicious trash to this already sumptuous trash cake. Think of this as just frosting:
Say the person who finds out is Rollins or somebody and they go the blackmail route and make Rumlow their personal bitch...

They start to order Rumlow to do humiliating things around the office or in STRIKE locker rooms, like wearing little thongs, waxing his ass, waxing his whole body, etc.
Just Rumlow shivering with embarrassment and trying to act all casual about shit while people call him a fag. He just pretends to laugh it off like 'haha fuck you' while internally he just wants to go hide and wank and probably cry

Steve becomes hyper protective to an unhealthy extent

[(Anonymous)]

After learning all the lurid details of the trash that happened to Bucky all these years, Steve becomes extremely protective of Bucky from everyone around him. At first it's fine and Bucky appreciates it, it helps him feel taken care of and safe, but slowly overtime, Steve's unchecked behavior spirals into something more neurotic. It goes from making sure nobody gets in Bucky's personal space or crowds him to making sure nobody fucking touches him ever or even looks at him for too long, etc. It becomes so over-protective and hyper vigilant that it starts to go back around to reminding Bucky of the winter soldier's handlers again, trying to control every single aspect of his life and what stimuli he's allowed to have in it.

It all comes to a head when Bucky starts being romantically involved with someone (Sam preferred--it helps make everyone's pain greater if it's someone Steve would feel extra conflicted about and if it's someone who maybe doesn't have superpowers to take care of themselves against a super soldier) and it sends Steve's protectiveness over the edge. Maybe he supervises them in a non-consensually voyeuristic way (in that they don't know he's watching), or he finds ways to split them up, or he accuses Sam (or whoever) of taking advantage of Bucky and using him the way Hydra did (which has the side effect of making Bucky feel shittier because it's like Steve thinks he's such damaged goods that he can never not be used). Maaaaaaaybe they kind of enable Steve/accommodate his increasingly unreasonable demands, because they're all friends and they want Steve to be comfortable, or because on some level they fear he's right.

Bonus points if you can get across the idea that Steve is internally really cut up about this, because he knows--especially in the moments he's treating Sam (or whoever) like shit--that he is doing something Not Good, but it's like he can't help it, he can't stop this compulsion.

Super extra bonus points if you can figure out a way to give all three parties equal weight in terms of expoloring how much the situation is fucking all of them up. I want the pain to spread in concentric circles outwards and encompass everyone. >:)

Re: Steve becomes hyper protective to an unhealthy extent

[(Anonymous)]

Abusive kind of protectiveness is my favorite type of trash EVER. My garbage heart and piles of rotten tomatoes are here for you, nonnie.

Bucky is a projective empath

[(Anonymous)]

I've seen empath!Bucky headcanons before -- I think there's even a prompt somewhere in the depths of the meme -- but I don't think I've ever come across this angle on it. So, Bucky has always been an empath, but before the war all he could do was pick up other people's emotions. Later, a combination of Hydra's weaponization of him and his own subconscious efforts to survive in an abusive environment warped his ability into projective empathy; that is, now he transmits his emotions to others.

So imagine post-CATWS, traumatized Bucky not having the slightest control over what he projects and to whom. He's like a radio tower broadcasting feelings to everyone who comes near him. If he's calm or happy, this is fine. But if he's having a panic attack, anyone within the radius will also start freaking out; if he's having a nightmare, everyone in the building wakes up screaming; if he's caught in a loop of traumatic memories, everyone else starts feeling that same agony, self-loathing, desperation for the pain to go away, shame; if he's in a depressive low, other people walk around under that cloud of sullenness and dull misery. And if he's feeling self-destructive, like self-harming, or even suicidal, well...

I just want all the pain that goes with a situation where Bucky isn't violent, but his emotional pain is what makes him dangerous to be around. At best, you'll feel his unhappiness. And at worst, you could hurt yourself.

+ Steve isn't willing to abandon him so this takes a huuuge toll on his wellbeing

+ lots and lots of uncomfortable voyeuristic intimacy, with everyone getting exact knowledge of just how badly Bucky is hurting

++ emphasis on his history of rape, please, where everyone knows a) how fucked up he is over those memories and b) thanks to his flashbacks, how being raped felt

Steve and Bucky trying to deal with both their trash pasts, with dubious success

[(Anonymous)]

So Bucky's been through some trashy stuff, per the standard, and so has Steve - maybe an abusive gaslighty relationship with Rumlow, maybe bad guys really like doing terrible terrible things to captain America when he is tied up and at their mercy. Probably both. Maybe Pierce also had a hand in it. Whatever the reason, both of them have terrible trash pasts, so of course despite their romantic (and probably sexual) attraction to each other it makes their relationship kind of difficult.
- both of them really dread sex and possibly there is some kind of physical mark of the abuse they went through - scars or a brand or maybe like, scar tissue around their genitals and anus, which would give away the terrible trash past if seen
-the discovery is made after lots of terror on both their parts and pushing themselves to have sex before they are ready, and it results in the two of them feeling guilty that they pressured the other one into sex and that the other one "had it worse". Maybe Bucky thinks that Steve has it worse because he isn't a murderer like Bucky is, and therefore didn't deserve it poem Bucky did. maybe Steve thinks Bucky had it worse because he had to endure seventy years of it and from so many people, whereas Steve "only" was abused by a handful (or two) of people and he's only had to endure it since he got the serum, except maybe a few incidents in the back alleys of Brooklyn.
-they both are constantly worried about becoming abusers, especially since they both know how horrible it is to be on the other side of that, but instead of just being mindful and respectful they constantly question themselves and are anxious about every single interaction. Bucky knows Ateve would roll over and let him kill him. Steve is always really aware that he is basically Bucky's only support structure in both emotional and financial terms.
Basically I just want anything where they are both traumatised and it's two way recovery trash and since they are both stubborn assholes who dig their heels in against therapy (Steve more than Bucky) they both develop really unhealthy perspectives that really fuck with their relationship. But they still love each other and want it to work and there is So Much Anguish

Re: Steve and Bucky trying to deal with both their trash pasts, with dubious success

[(Anonymous)]

Backed with the intensity of a thousand suns!

Skinny Steve/Schmidt + present Hydra gangbang

[(Anonymous)]

I'm looking for A) Steve and Schmidt had a thing before the war and B) all the accompanying angst and trashiness when future Hydra works this out somehow and throw it in his face during a gangbang.

I realize that's hard to work into a plot line but I feel like there's wiggle room.
Maybe before shit broke out with Germany invading Poland, Schmidt traveled to the US for (whatever reason, doesn't matter) We already know that there were Hydra within the US even during the war like Kruger.
So could be undercover Schmidt. Idk why just... just go with it, dumpster friends. OR maybe Steve for some godforsaken reason is in Europe? Whatevs.

Steve has a relationship with tall dark and handsome pre skull Schmidt. He seems all charming and cultured maybe. Steve doesn't know he's a Nazi, etc

I would LOVE for Steve to have fallen madly in love with Schmidt and then he's all broken hearted when Schmidt is like 'whelp, I gotta fuck off back to Germany now. Nice fucking you. Byeeee!'

+ Steve questioning his self worth after being fucked and dumped by Schmidt. "I was only good for a few weeks/ I'm so stupid/easy, how could I let myself be used like that?"
+ Bucky having to put Steve back together again after he's been used and dumped. Bucky secretly being jealous and having feels for Steve that he's never admitted to.
+ Schmidt throwing it in his face during Bucky rescue scene but secretly regretting they aren't on the same side
+ post Azzano Bucky finding out and being disgusted like "THAT's the asshole you were all broken up about back in the day??"

+++++ All the urine soaked, shredded newspaper confetti if 2014 Hydra finds out or knows and it's like an inside joke. They've been waiting and planning for a gangbang and Steve is thoroughly humiliated.
+ Some douche bag wears a Red Skull mask or they all dress like Schmidt like "You know you want this. Hey look my dick is red haha!"

Bucky in chastity

[(Anonymous)]

WS Bucky was kept in chastity any time he was out of cryo. Insert your preferred reason here, like maybe it was a way to control him and make sure he didn't get distracted by getting hard, they didn't want him fucking anyone, it was one of Pierce's twisted little games, or whatever. Since he wasn't given the chance to get hard they'd just milk his prostrate to drain his balls. This made him really sensitive to prostate stimulation which leads me to: I want the aftermath of this with Steve. Bucky can't get it up but he can come, and come hard, by getting fucked. Maybe Steve gets off on how soft Bucky stays while Steve fucks him and he feels terrible because he knows how much the whole thing bothers Bucky. I will be an extra happy dumpster camper if you have Steve fondling Bucky's flaccid cock while he gets him off or fucks him.

Re: Bucky in chastity

[(Anonymous)]

This this thiiiiis

claustrophobia

[(Anonymous)]

In captivity, Bucky was often raped in his dark, cramped little cell. As a result, in recovery he suffers from extreme claustrophobia. He manages to disguise how crippling the problem is, but it's fairly obvious small spaces at least bother him.

Then one day he and Steve are out on a mission and there's a cave-in/detonation/earthquake and they find themselves stuck in a little pocket of space, in the rubble, underground. With no hope of escaping themselves, they're stuck waiting for rescue. Which might be okay, except Bucky starts to panic and can't stop. Cue Steve trying to comfort and support Bucky through the long hours in the stifling dark.

+ Bucky becomes a total wreck; panic attacks, difficulty breathing, clammy sweat, faintness. If he was also physically injured in the structural collapse that would be great. Like, he's so fucked up from this Steve's freaking out thinking he needs to get Bucky to a hospital somehow

+ Steve did not know Bucky was raped and this is how he finds out

+ not very many people could fit in his cell, so often there'd be a line out the door for gangbangs

Re: claustrophobia

[(Anonymous)]

I like this a lot, but what part of Bucky and/or Steve's behavior would elicit the trash-ness? Does he start thinking Steve's just there to rape him? Does he try to attack Steve or run away? Does he drop to his knees and start begging? Does Steve have to slap or otherwise mistreat Bucky in order to get him to calm down?

Steve + Self Harm (during Bucky's recovery)

[(Anonymous)]

Steve has various ways of coping with stuff -- throwing himself into his work, running really fast around the mall, but I feel like a pretty major one is getting himself into dangerous situations where he might get hurt. So during Bucky's recovery -- he can't exactly do that with the same abandon, so he turns to various ways of self harm as a way of coping with the self-blame and anger that comes from whatever Hydra Horrors Bucky mentions, and also the stress of just trying to help Bucky.

Of course, with the super serum, any cuts heal pretty fast, but they can still be briefly painful. And maybe he breaks his finger bones before going to bed, and they're still healing and tender the next day, so he has to say he slept on his hands funny. (And during the next day's training he still insists on punching things super hard)

Just... Steve bleeding on himself because he doesn't want to bleed on other people, and all sort of unhealthy self-blame stuff.

+ Steve inflicting any pain on himself that HYDRA had inflicted on Bucky. A sort of self-castigation of sorts. Anything from whipping to stun batons to large dildos in his butt -- as long as Steve is feeling miserable and relishing every moment of it. Because it's Steve's fault that Bucky had to deal with it (because Steve didn't go back to find him.)

++ Hiding EVERYTHING from Bucky and making himself distant and wearing long sleeves and withholding touch from Bucky, at a time when Bucky really needs it.

+++ It all gets outed in a weirdly public way, like medical records going public showing waaay too many bone fractures, or a last-minute mission going south

++++ But at first people assume that it was cause he'd recently gotten captured by HYDRA, but Steve has to admit to his self harm, because in spite of everything, Steve takes responsibility for his actions.

Re: Steve + Self Harm (during Bucky's recovery)

[(Anonymous)]

Oh god, the first bonus! Maybe unhealthy hookups, too?

Bucky is convinced that Steve's lack of self-preservation is Steve's way of punishing Bucky

[(Anonymous)]

Bucky's come in from the cold, and there are no more punishments like there was when he was the Asset, for anything he does as Bucky or did as the Asset. But all the punishments Hydra doled out (for malfunctioning, for misbehavior, for trying to be a real person) couldn't compare to how terrible he feels whenever Steve puts himself in danger. So Steve must have figured out what would hurt Bucky the most, since Hydra's punishments clearly didn't stick, and is punishing him in a far more effective way.

Besides, Bucky knows, rationally, that Steve has a team and that most of the risks Steve takes are fairly calculated, and Bucky put himself at far greater risk when he was the Asset and he always survived, and Steve has a better version of the serum than he did. Steve has superior healing abilities and strength and everything. Bucky knows that. But it still frightens him like nothing else whenever Steve takes a big, often needless risk. There's nothing in the world worse than not knowing if Steve will be okay. And since these risks are often avoidable and Steve knows exactly how Bucky feels about them, because Bucky told him, the fact that he continues to take them must mean he's punishing Bucky, right?

Bucky remembers he used to do this Before, too, when Steve was small. He would punish Bucky by getting hurt. It's a strange philosophy, but it works.

So Bucky keeps trying to figure out what he's being punished for. Is it because of what he did as the Asset? Is it because he ate without permission? Is it because he got angry at Steve the other night? Is it because he shot that Hydra agent sneaking up behind Sam even though their orders were to bring him in alive? Whatever it is, he'll stop, as long as Steve stops putting himself at risk and punishing him like this. It's worse than anything he's ever felt.

(Steve/Bucky or gen, please.)

Re: Bucky is convinced that Steve's lack of self-preservation is Steve's way of punishing Bucky

[(Anonymous)]

"Bucky remembers he used to do this Before, too, when Steve was small. He would punish Bucky by getting hurt. "

Is Bucky remembering Steve getting into fights and believing it was to hurt him or did Steve actually hurt himself to hurt Bucky when he was smaller.

Steve believes he's an actor

[(Anonymous)]

I know it's ridiculous but hear me out!
Hydra wiped Steve and made him believe he's actually a porn star and that the Captain America thing was just a role he played. This can work however you want - maybe Hydra won, whatever.
Hydra basically filmed him being raped in the Captain America costume and marketed it as a porn/made it look consensual. Maybe they made it look like Steve was on their side all along somehow. Hydra gets a willing fucktoy and the problem of one of their greatest enemies is taken care of. Even if Steve regains his memories, they can just wipe him again and obviously no one will believe him now that everyone thinks he's Hydra's willing whore.
Naturally all the other 'actors' Steve works with are Hydra agents. Film crew? Hydra agents. You get the point. Steve happily driving in to work and having drinks afterward with people who are secretly laughing at him behind his back. A cast of 'friends' who look like his old friends (a redhead named Natalie, a black guy named Sean, etc)


Bonus points for Bucky and/or Natasha showing up and trying to convince him of who he really is. Steve gets this weird feeling he knows this guy from somewhere but he isn't sure where. You don't have to write a rescue, it's just fun to picture Steve being all 'Wtf, you mean I actually CAN throw that shield and break people's necks with it?? I knew I was strong but I just thought I was weird!'

Re: Steve believes he's an actor

[(Anonymous)]

His lack of memory could be explained as 'you had a really bad injury while you were deployed in Iraq/some modern conflict' Hydra just finds ways to explain his weird memories that don't make sense. Like 'yeah you used to be pretty sick when you were younger but then you bulked up'

Bucky tries to get punished

[(Anonymous)]

inspired by a comment in another post: Bucky tries to get Steve to punish him.

I'm thinking this is pretty soon after Steve finds him. Bucky's had many different handlers, and some of them much more lenient than others. Steve is the nicest, by far, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have a line. And after a while (maybe a few months) of enjoying not being hurt, Bucky gets enough memory/cognition back to decide he has to know where that line is so he can be careful not to cross it.

Cue Bucky doing things he knows Steve won't like to try to get Steve to hit him. He doesn't want a serious punishment, just a slap or something, so he'll know what not to do.

Bonus for Bucky being smart and manipulative about the things he tries: hurting himself, threatening other people Steve cares about, refusing to eat, etc. Stuff that will genuinely upset Steve.

Re: Bucky tries to get punished

[(Anonymous)]

yep i'm here for this trash

Bucky gets triggered to be way way aroused 24/7

[(Anonymous)]

So hydra had some kind of trigger they would use on WS before trash parties that made him super hard and super horny and super desperate to get fucked. Post-TWS, while recovering with Steve, this hidden trigger gets set off somehow. So Bucky is ridiculously, like painfully aroused and no one knows what to do or how to stop it. Steve, Sam, and Nat take turns staying home with him and going out to hunt down intel.
+ Bucky is far enough in his recovery that he's regained some sense of self and is horribly ashamed by this. (The trigger affects him physically, mentally he's still Bucky, he didn't slip back into WS)
+ Steve et al. didn't know Bucky had been raped, or suspected sexual abuse but not to what extent and this is how they find out.
+ Bucky is trying to manage this on his own, that is, he is masturbating 24/7. He does not actually want to have sex with Steve et al. Up to author if he is coming over and over and it's not helping or if he's not coming at all, I like both options.
+ Some hydra agent tells Steve the only way to stop it is to fuck Bucky until he's worn out, basically. Steve feels he should be the one to do this since they are the closest (maybe they were in a relationship before? idc either way really, both have great trash potential) and he has the stamina to match Bucky's needs (that is, fake a gang bang)
++++ Steve is super mortified about having to do this (of course, it's def not actually consensual and he doesn't want to hurt Bucky) and expects Bucky to feel the same way but when he brings it up Bucky is so desperate for it to be over his reaction is all "YAAAASSSS FUCK ME STEVE." Which does not make Steve feel any better. Up to author of they actually go through with it or find some last minute save (or if they do go through with it, whether it actually works or whether the hydra guy was lying to fuck with them)
++++++++++++++++ If the info hunt takes days (at least) and whoever is staying with Bucky has to help him with things like eating or whatever, and he's horrified that anyone would see him like this but also just can't stop jerking off/fucking himself with a dildo/playing with his nipples/whatever author might want. I just want, like, Sam bringing a bowl of soup into Bucky's room and trying not to look while Bucky's furiously masturbating and trying to keep himself covered at the same time.

Re: Bucky gets triggered to be way way aroused 24/7

[(Anonymous)]

Yes, please.

Angry Bucky's bad coping via casual sex

[(Anonymous)]

After being rescued and brought in by Steve, Bucky's starting to regain his memories, but he still feels trapped and dependent (by all the surveillance at Stark Tower/new SHIELD headquarters/living with Steve/whatever), and he deals with these feelings and returning memories by getting angry and pushing Steve away. When memories of rape and sexual torture start coming back, he deals with those memories by sneaking out and having all kinds of dangerous, unhealthy random sex.

He goes to the seediest bars, blows random guys in dirty bathrooms, doesn't use condoms, accepts drugs whenever they're offered (though he has to use more than most people to feel any effects, I imagine enough drugs would still have some effect), and other things of that nature.

++++At some point Steve figures out what he's been doing and tries to confront him, and he yells at Steve about how it's his life, and everyone keeps telling him that he's safe now and he can make his own decisions and he's in charge of his own life, but no one really means it because everyone still has their own ideas about how he's supposed to behave and how he should be coping, but he CAN and he WILL cope however he pleases, and Steve has no say in that. Which of course would cause all kinds of sad Steve angst, and questions of, "Should I really do anything? He does have a point that it's his life, and he was controlled for so long so maybe I don't have the right to tell him not to do this thing."

(Plus Infinity) if Steve backs off after this conversation, and Bucky takes it as the rejection he never let himself realize he was waiting for, and immediately goes off to find even more dangerous sex than he had been having.

++Bucky is up for any kinks his casual sex partners throw at him, even when they make him really uncomfortable. I'm up for whatever people can come up with here.

WS/Hydra Starvation and Force-feeding

[(Anonymous)]

Hydra's not exactly the best at making sure the Asset is fed routinely. Too many people all thinking somebody else took care of it today. The Soldier's been getting more and more hungry, and been trying to ignore it, because if he asks for anything not related to an immediate, visible medical need he'll be punished. The Asset isn't allowed to be below functional, so when it gets really bad and starts to interfere with his concentration, he starts asking for food anyway, but nobody believes he needs any more because somebody else has already fed him, right? The mission he just went on was long and tedious and nobody bothered to make sure the Asset had food in the sniper's nest the thirty-six hours he was up there, and when they get back to base, Bucky collapses.
When he wakes up, he's strapped down except for his left arm (which is a little confusing, but not out of the ordinary), and on the table before him is enough food to feed an army. (Which is very much out of the ordinary). A superior is there, and they invite him to eat. He does, not even minding the use of his left arm, but because he went without for so long he can only take so much. He tries to communicate this fullness but his superior encourages him to continue eating, and continue eating, and continue eating, and when the Solider can't possibly manage one more bite, that's when the reinforcements arrive, not leaving until the Soldier has swallowed every single thing on the table. (And maybe some of them take other liberties while he's restrained. And of course the enema is necessary, Boss. How else are they supposed to get this all down him? And does it count if he vomits it up again? Maybe we should make him eat that too. Can't go and teach him wastefulness, now.)

Bucky jerking off and Hydra agents come in

[(Anonymous)]

Post CATWS, Bucky's a year along in recovery. Everything is doing great and he's feeling comfortable with himself, confident, etc.
He's living with Steve and/or Sam in an apartment in NYC and one day Steve or whoever else is home happens to be out. Bucky takes advantage of their absence to jerk off.
That's when Hydra agents happen to raid the apartment.
Maybe they know he's there, maybe they don't. Either way, they're pleasantly surprised to catch him jerking off.

Naturally they manage to paralyze him or tranquilize him somehow. I'd like him to still be awake and aware but unable to escape or fight back. They have fun with him and mock him. Maybe he was fingering himself and he's all lubed up.

I'd like for Bucky to have never been raped by them before and rape having been something that only rarely happened throughout the past 70 years, so he's not "used to it" or anything like that.

++ somebody climbs through his bedroom window. Bucky's let his guard down so far that he didn't even hear them slipping in.

+++ Bucky comes several times during the rape because he's already aroused

Epic trash gala if Steve, Sam, or Nat come home/chase off the Hydra agents. I would love for it to be Nat who discovers him and Bucky begs her not to tell Steve what happened even though he's horribly traumatized.

Steve Rogers and the Self Lubricating Ass

[(Anonymous)]

I would love to see a) Steve having been experimented on by Hydra and then wiped pre or during CA:TWS so he doesn't remember anything trashy happening to him. And b) one day Steve wakes up or goes running or something and suddenly his ass is lubricating itself.

+ All the embarrassment and humiliation of his ass leaking constantly. Maybe he has to wear adult diapers? Or like a butt plug?
+ The butt plug doesn't work because it just ends up making him incredibly horny
+ Steve fingering himself. Sure he was pretty liberal being an artist back in the 40s and he grew up seeing 'queer' folk but he never really did anything like that himself.

++ Bucky also has the same problem and just never mentioned it. So when he finds out he tries to help the freaked out Steve calm down and shows him different ways to disguise it a la maxi pads or menstrual cup/whatever anon likes to write.

+++ Steve goes to the doctor at some point and they're just like "Wow... I've never seen this before. This is actually pretty fascinating. What does it feel like?" etc Mortified Steve being probed by doctor wearing gloves, just checking his prostate, etc.

++++ Natasha or someone finds intel that shows this is the result of Hydra experimenting on him. Maybe a video where he's being probed by Hydra techs and/or fucked by STRIKE while he's clearly unconscious or mind fucked from a recent wipe.

Bucky's childish behavior and daddy kink

[(Anonymous)]

Just give me post CATWS asset being a little shit when he comes to live with Steve. Maybe he refuses to use a toilet and shits on the floor. Maybe he scowls when Steve tries to make him eat solid food and will only drink protein shakes or juiced veggies. Maybe he only eats Oreos or things Hydra never let him have but it makes him puke. Bucky doesn't want to shower or wear clothes. He likes to roll around naked or only wears sweatpants all the time. He refuses to get dressed just because people are over. Just general misbehavior and noncompliance for the sake of noncompliance.

Hydra's way of curing this behavior was obviously pain related.
So maybe while interrogating a Hydra agent, they happen to mention that Bucky's handler was also his 'daddy' and that spankings would usually help.
They just don't mention that spankings also turn Bucky on and mean that it's time to be a good sexy boy for his handler.

+Steve being so fucking frustrated with Bucky's behavior that he finally just breaks down and decides Bucky needs a spanking.
+Steve being all dad like and gentle about it. "This is going to hurt me more than it will you."
+ Steve with his hands full of horny, pliant, wiggly Bucky
+ Bucky calling Steve 'Daddy' afterward and being well behaved.
++ Steve's general mortification and angst for Bucky clearly having been abused and the worst part is that it actually improves Bucky's behavior and now he EXPECTS Steve to continue it.

Oblivious Steve

[(Anonymous)]

Sort of an opposite of the overly worrying Steve thing, just like a Steve who does not realize how damaged Bucky is. He knows Hydra was horrible, he knows Bucky was tortured, he gets all of that. But like most nice, sane human beings, he doesn't realize just how sick and twisted Hydra was. So when Bucky is triggered, Steve understands that he's being reminded of horrible things but doesn't have a clue as to what it actually is.

Add to that, sexual abuse maybe just doesn't occur to him. Steve has a sort of standard patriarchal view of rape - rape doesn't really happen to men, why would a big muscular guy like Bucky be raped? etc

Then Steve finds pictures or even videos of Bucky's early conditioning and it's just horrible, horrible stuff like Bucky wearing a chain around his neck, left outside in a shed somewhere in Russia during the winter. Bucky covered in filth and hosed off, then raped and pissed on. Bucky shivering and trying to get close to his rapists for body warmth. Given dinner scraps as a 'Christmas present.' Especially videos or accounts of Bucky breaking in the early days and giving in.

+ Steve sees pictures of Bucky after he's gotten the news that Steve died and the way he's just slumped in his cell or weeping.
+Shit is so awful that Steve throws up and cries
+ Steve realizing just how far down the garbage chute goes. Never looking at Bucky the same way again.
+ All of Steve's guilt - feeling like an ass because he didn't see just how badly Bucky's been hurting.
+The kicker when Steve realizes that Bucky's actually dealing with things in a healthier way because he's going to therapy and talking about it, taking medication, etc whereas Steve has just buried all of his emotional shit.

Re: Oblivious Steve

[(Anonymous)]

Excuse me but your ideas about Bucky's early conditioning are simply TOO WONDERFUL. Trying to get close to his rapists for warmth? Why are you so perfect?

"Recovery" prompts

[trashmod]

hydratrashmeme's general subject matter is "sexual violence and violent sex: the kinkmeme." Not "Bucky is the saddest woobie and it's everyone else's responsibility to provide optimum caretaking for his issues: the kinkmeme." Not that that isn't a legitimate h/c subgenre with an illustrious history in various fandoms, but there's a time and a place, and right now it's starting to crowd out everything else on the meme.

This isn't a ban, just a request to put the brakes on the flood of capital-r Recovery prompts. Their on-topic-ness has always been a gray area, subject to their HTP relevance, and right now the ratio of mental health porn to actual trash is somewhere in the ballpark of 2:1. That's not what the meme's here for, guys. It's not incompatible what the meme's here for, but it's not the actual topic.

(The request to put the brakes on does not apply to fills--prompts are cheap and fills are precious, so please fill anything and everything you want to.)

Re: "Recovery" prompts

[(Anonymous)]

I'm not sure I'm clear on this. Does this apply to all recovery prompts, or just ones that don't focus on the fallout of sexual violence? Because rape aftermath is much more my trash jam than something that solely encompasses the assault itself, and why would that be off topic? :|